How Many Five Year Olds Could You Take in a Fight?

This short survey will tell you approximately how many five year old children you could fight at once. Results are based on physical prowess, training, swarm-combatting experience, and the flexibility of your moral compass. Here are the ground rules:

  • You are in an enclosed area roughly the size of a basketball court
  • There are no weapons or foreign objects
  • Everyone is wearing a cup (so no kicks to the groin)
  • The children are merciless and will show no fear
  • If a child is knocked unconscious, he is "out." The same goes for you.


Like this quiz? Try How Many 90 Year Olds Could You Take in a Fight?

Thanks to this forum post for the inspiration.

Part 1. Physical Ability
What's your body type?
How's your reach of your arms?
Which best describes your sense of balance:
How high can you kick?
How tall are you?
How old are you?

Next Section

Part 2. Experience and Training
Do you have any martial arts experience?
In your lifetime, how many fights have you been in?
Do you have any experience fighting swarms, such as being chased by a bunch of pissed-off bees or playing starcraft against the Zerg?
Have you ever been trampled? (by a horse, at a rock concert, etc)

Next Section

Part 3. Moral Compass
If desperate in a fight, would you resort to biting and/or eye-gouging? (Do you fight dirty?)
How would you feel about the fact that you're fighting a bunch of kids?
During the fight, would you feel morally comfortable picking up a child and using him/her as a weapon to throw at other children?

Ok, I'm finished - What's My Score?