Topic: Admit It, Ladies, You Don't Want "Smart"
LexFonteyne Joined Thu 12/07/06 Posts: 26963 |
I'm going to go out on a limb here because, well, what the hell difference can it possibly make at this point?
(That's a rhetorical question, by the way. You don't have to answer that one. It won't be on the final.) OK, here's the scenario. I read lots of women's profiles. I have to. That's where I get the material for OGP. And most of them say "I want to meet a guy who's intelligent" or something along those lines. And most of the women I've been involved with have commented on my intellect, some of them almost non-stop. "Oh, you're the smartest person I've ever met!" they say with a tinge of admiration (or is that jealousy, or premeditated murder?) in their voices. Well, I don't know. Considering most of them have grown up in environments where a llama wearing a red hat would be considered a genius, I don't know how much stock to put in these assessments, but I guess they're still better than being married or having to eat broccoli. I mean, OK, I'm pretty smart, as these things go, and if that makes me sound like an Arrogant Narcissistic Conceited jerk, well, I'm OK with that. I don't believe in false modesty, and I'm not entirely convinced that true modesty is such a great idea, either. So, here's the problem -- once I get comfortable in the relationship (or as close to "comfortable" as I can let myself get, at this point), there's always this sudden change where she wants me to TURN MY BRAIN OFF AND BECOME A CARDBOARD CUTOUT OF WARD CLEAVER IN A BUSINESS SUIT. In other words, she wants me to become the very opposite of the person she was originally attracted to in the first place. What's wrong with this picture? (Rhetorical again. Not on final.) Now, maybe there is a woman out there who really does want an intelligent guy. And maybe all of the profiles that say "Looks don't matter, it's what's on the inside that counts" are being totally honest, too.... And maybe Martians will visit us tonight and give us all Snickers bars. I also know that anytime I post anything that calls people's behaviors into question, 500 of them will immediately say "I'm not like that!" -- which is a nice, knee-jerk, reflexive response. I'm calling BS here. THAT will be on the final. |
28chacha Joined Wed 06/02/10 Posts: 62 |
Women do want smart and intelligent men. But really what they want is demonstrably smart and talented with those smarts. Witty, humorous, good at work or business, brainy, etc. They don't like boring, deserted, dessicated brains. Only zombies might not know the difference.
Edited by 28chacha on Tue 08/10/10 06:26 PM
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klc Joined Sat 08/18/07 Posts: 3021 |
I love broccoli.
I think they are being honest Lex. They want smaht, but they still wanna be the smahtah one. I would be shocked if the Ward Cleaver comment were true, unless they know somethin Im not hip to? Wow, chacha, good stuff there. I think they want a man who can do everything without them, and still want them around. We cant all love broccoli tho can we? (secretly on the test)
Edited by klc on Tue 08/10/10 06:32 PM
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Dragoness Joined Wed 10/17/07 Posts: 18557 |
I have to agree with chacha on this one a bit.
It is all about how you use your intellect. IE There are sticks in the mud who are complete brainiacs but you can't stand to talk to them too long because they use the brain in non upbeat or positive ways. Pessimism and dismalism about life wears thin after a while. Realizing you will have to hear the pessimism for the rest of your life with that person makes you want to cut it short, the relationship, not the life. Or IE, a man who beats those around him down with his intellect, is intolerable after a while too. A person who is smart and knows it. Versus a person who is smart and doesn't care, they just want to live and love and be happy. |
MelodyGirl Joined Sun 01/25/09 Posts: 8553 |
Lex, you know me. I have zero tolerance for stupid, naiveté, urban mannerisms, ignorance or a minimal formal education.
I unequivocally want a man than can keep up with me intellectually as well as the area of common sense. I won't respect him otherwise – and I have to be with someone I respect. Maybe I ruined myself because I chose to get my master's degree (and possibly my doctoral)? Maybe I expect the same in my partner - and it's probably not fair to anyone I meet. I try not to have bias, however, it's a turn-off when a guy can't calculate tax or tip, fix a sprinkler head, or change his own oil. I'm really attracted to guys who can help me study for exams and actually understand the material.
Edited by MelodyGirl on Tue 08/10/10 06:48 PM
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Derekkye Joined Sat 12/22/07 Posts: 3261 |
fools think they are wise, but wise people know themselves to be fools
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AndyBgood Joined Thu 12/25/08 Posts: 5775 |
http://www.dailymotion.com/video/xj0fo_kid-creole-and-the-coconuts-endicot_music
I look women right in the eyes and flatly tell them... "I'll never be just like Endicott!" (beware of deadly ads on the video though. Make sure to invoke the red x box on them!) |
RainbowTrout Joined Fri 04/06/07 Posts: 7610 |
Some women want to create man in their own image. Someone who was taught like they were to be a socialite and to look good in public. Someone they can take home to mother and be proud of. Watch this, mom, I have taught him to roll over and play dead. He is such a good dog. I am still trying to house break him. And mom says well that may time, dear. It took me a while to house break your dad but it was worth the effort because we have been married all these years. Does he go to work everyday? Oh, yes, mom. Can I keep him, mom? I don't know. do you think he will look good with your furniture? Has he had all his shots? Have you made a dog house for him, yet? Surely you don't want to keep him the house. Does he chase cats when you are not around? Have you had him neutered, yet? Will he make you look good in public? How have your girlfriends reacted to him? I tell you what. If you and him can along I will have the remote control device installed for him so you can know where he is at all times and it will allow you to control him better. Deal? Oh, thank you, mom. I know you would understand.
Edited by RainbowTrout on Tue 08/10/10 06:54 PM
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klc Joined Sat 08/18/07 Posts: 3021 |
QUOTE: Some women want to create man in their own image. Someone who was taught like they were to be a socialite and to look good in public. Someone they can take home to mother and be proud of. Watch this, mom, I have taught him to roll over and play dead. He is such a good dog. I am still trying to house break him. And mom says well that may time, dear. It took me a while to house break your dad but it was worth the effort because we have been married all these years. Does he go to work everyday? Oh, yes, mom. Can I keep him, mom? I don't know. do you think he will look good with your furniture? Has he had all his shots? Have you made a dog house for him, yet? Surely you don't want to keep him the house. Does he chase cats when you are not around? Have you had him neutered, yet? Will he make you look good in public? How have your girlfriends reacted to him? I tell you what. If you and him can along I will have the remote control device installed for him so you can know where he is at all times and it will allow you to control him better. Deal? Oh, thank you, mom. I know you would understand. sounds like a lot a work man. No thanks. |
ValentinaSS Joined Sun 05/23/10 Posts: 588 |
A highly intelligent person is bound to have problems finding an equal.
When women say they want an intelligent guy, they probably don`t mean a genius (so it`s not intentional b.s., i guess).
Edited by ValentinaSS on Tue 08/10/10 07:09 PM
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AndyBgood Joined Thu 12/25/08 Posts: 5775 |
QUOTE: fools think they are wise, but wise people know themselves to be fools And the smart man knows everything he knows is wrong! |
LadyLovely1105 Joined Thu 04/01/10 Posts: 639 |
very true Derek...I absolutely LOVE a smart man, however, there is a time for serious conversation and even debate at times, but there's a time to turn it off and have brainless fun! I admire one who can laugh at themselves, admit when they're wrong (ie:being open-minded to a new way of doing things).
In my lifetime, I have realized that the more I think I know, the less I really do. There is NO humility at all in cockiness or arrogance. There is no joy in laughing with others if I can't laugh at myself! smart men learn from their own mistakes, wise men learn from others mistakes! Trust me on this one....intelligence is NOT the only factor in finding the ideal mate!! |
Tromette Joined Wed 08/06/08 Posts: 961 |
I've never gone on more than one date with a dumb dude.
It's more than just smarts that I require, though they are necessary for me. I would definitely date an unattractive guy who was super intelligent over a hot guy who was a tard. Keep in mind, however, that a lot of the time, super intelligence is also paired with social awkwardness. At least in my experiences. |
pmarco41 Joined Wed 04/30/08 Posts: 316 |
I prefer my men handsome and dumb...Im smart enough for the both of us and I dont need him getting frowny wrinkles from thinking too much..
whats really obnoxious are men who "think" they are smart because they´ve been told that a few times by horney women who are just looking to get laid... |
Tromette Joined Wed 08/06/08 Posts: 961 |
QUOTE: I prefer my men handsome and dumb...Im smart enough for the both of us and I dont need him getting frowny wrinkles from thinking too much.. whats really obnoxious are men who "think" they are smart because they´ve been told that a few times by horney women who are just looking to get laid... Dumb guys who think they're smart ARE the worst! |
Tromette Joined Wed 08/06/08 Posts: 961 |
QUOTE: I prefer my men handsome and dumb...Im smart enough for the both of us and I dont need him getting frowny wrinkles from thinking too much.. I just wonder how you don't get bored and frustrated constantly. I get so annoyed when I have to talk about stupid shite. After the first time, I find myself avoiding conversation with that person at all cost! After a boring, stupid conversation with a guy, he's instantly not attractive anymore. |
justme659 Joined Wed 10/03/07 Posts: 4477 |
You can call B.S. all you want. I do that also. As a person of the female type, I can honestly say I am not looking for intellegent, but I won't deal with stupid either. As far as brains go, he ( my dream guy ) should at least be able to carry on a conversation that is not limited to only football. Now there is nothing wrong with football (American by the way) I like football better than the average female goat, but there is more to life than that. And I am no where near the Einstein level of intellegence but I would love to learn more. But to have to deal with lint lickers, would push me to run the 2 second mile. Swish. In closing, I would rather have a 3 musketeers.
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LexFonteyne Joined Thu 12/07/06 Posts: 26963 |
QUOTE: Lex, you know me. I have zero tolerance for stupid, naiveté, urban mannerisms, ignorance or a minimal formal education. I unequivocally want a man than can keep up with me intellectually as well as the area of common sense. I won't respect him otherwise – and I have to be with someone I respect. Maybe I ruined myself because I chose to get my master's degree (and possibly my doctoral)? Maybe I expect the same in my partner - and it's probably not fair to anyone I meet. I try not to have bias, however, it's a turn-off when a guy can't calculate tax or tip, fix a sprinkler head, or change his own oil. I'm really attracted to guys who can help me study for exams and actually understand the material. Well, you're definitely not a typical example! I studied psychology for 7 years, so I have a pretty decent background in understanding people. Every girlfriend I've ever had has made it a point to tell me "You're the first guy who ever really listened to what I had to say!" as if that was some sort of miracle. I suspect some of them weren't being entirely honest but thought it would be a good thing to say anyway. But I do believe in listening to them, really listening, and letting them KNOW I'm listening. And that seems very disarming to them. Even with all that, though, they inevitably (with one exception) decide they need to change me into my polar opposite. I'm not saying there are no women who truly want smart men -- I'm just saying I've seen no personal evidence of it. I can't say the Yeti doesn't exist either. |
s1owhand Joined Fri 05/18/07 Posts: 23619 |
Ph.D.
Pretty Hot, Devastating. |
RainbowTrout Joined Fri 04/06/07 Posts: 7610 |
QUOTE: QUOTE: Some women want to create man in their own image. Someone who was taught like they were to be a socialite and to look good in public. Someone they can take home to mother and be proud of. Watch this, mom, I have taught him to roll over and play dead. He is such a good dog. I am still trying to house break him. And mom says well that may time, dear. It took me a while to house break your dad but it was worth the effort because we have been married all these years. Does he go to work everyday? Oh, yes, mom. Can I keep him, mom? I don't know. do you think he will look good with your furniture? Has he had all his shots? Have you made a dog house for him, yet? Surely you don't want to keep him the house. Does he chase cats when you are not around? Have you had him neutered, yet? Will he make you look good in public? How have your girlfriends reacted to him? I tell you what. If you and him can along I will have the remote control device installed for him so you can know where he is at all times and it will allow you to control him better. Deal? Oh, thank you, mom. I know you would understand. sounds like a lot a work man. No thanks. I don't blame you. Be careful when the mother says that she is too young to be a grandmother and asks you both if you can't just adopt instead. |